Fear, Worry, Anxiety

Anxiety or worry is a common issue. Anxiety and worry are a mix of thoughts and emotions. Anxiety and worry happen in our thoughts, but those thoughts have roots of unbelief. We develop anxious thoughts when we have a desired outcome of a future event and do not have the ability, power, or control to bring that result to fruition. 

Contrast responsible thinking with anxiety and worry. Being responsible is taking care and giving thought to how to live well and make decisions. Responsibility is taking care to attend to your business in a God-honoring way.

Anxiety and worry are not focused on honoring and glorifying God but about getting your own desired outcome. Anxious thoughts are unproductive and don’t lead to taking care of your business well. Worry tries to control the future, but you end up being controlled by the worrying thoughts. Anxious thoughts look to your own strength and resources to solve problems rather than looking to God. 

Stuart Scott created this helpful comparison.

Righteous Concern Sinful Worry

Focus = Today Focus = Tomorrow

Trust/Reliance = God Trust/Reliance = Self, Others, Circumstances

Pursuits = Eternal Pursuits = Temporary

One’s Plan: Solution Centered: proper dependence One’s Plan: Problem Centered, Improper Dependent action: prayer, talk with someone, write or independence reactions: gossip, laziness, call, have someone else help out with the situation. murmuring, prayerlessness, discouragement, x manipulate others, seek to control others/situation.

One’s Attitude: Thanksgiving One’s Attitude: Grumbling and Fretting

God’s Word: Holy Spirit helps on to control their mind. God’s Word: The Holy Spirit does not have control of x their thought life.

Responsibility: Trusts God and depends on God Responsibility: Self-Reliant

Symptoms: Restful sleep, healthy diet, encourages others Symptoms: sleeplessness, stomach and intestine x problems, ulcers, discourages others.

Glorifying/Pleasing To God Displeases God and eclipses God’s glory

Properly loving others Loving self

In what situations do you have sinful worry or anxiety?

Fear, anxiety, and worry tend to be rooted in desiring control. It may be relationship oriented or comfort minded, but fear, worry, and anxiety tend to be about getting what we want.

There are times when fear is a good emotion. Just like all the emotions, God gave them to us for a purpose. Fear tends to produce energy in our bodies, just like anger, and it gives us the opportunity to flee a situation that we should flee from. 

Proverbs 22:3  says, “The prudent see danger and take refuge, but the simple keep going and pay the penalty”.

A prudent person is someone who is wise. They are able to assess a situation and rightly apply the knowledge. The desire to preserve life and be secure can be a good desire. Fleeing is sometimes a wise choice.

We should flee, if possible, if we are in physical danger.

If your car stops on the railroad tracks and you hear the train whistle, you should feel fear and your body will produce different hormones and be moved to action. That’s a God-given gift of how your body works!

We should have a healthy fear of temptation and flee it.

Fear is a response to “perceived” danger. Sometimes we perceive danger accurately, like the example of the railroad tracks, and sometimes we don’t. Maybe we wake up startled by a noise and are fearful that someone has entered the house. This may not be reality. But if fear becomes a habit response we could end up avoiding life rather than living in trusting God.

Fear, anxiety, and worry can become habitual responses. You may not be aware of how quickly you choose to think anxious thoughts because it’s become a habit. 

For example,  people who grow up in chaotic, angry, or unpredictable homes will often develop fearful or anxious responses to social settings that are unpredictable. They will unconsciously make associations with past events and it will seem like the feelings come out of nowhere, when they are habitual.

Consider another example, people who have experienced harm may develop habitual ways of thinking and responses that are based on past situations rather than current circumstances. We want to be able to assess our emotions and respond to them in the light of truth.

Our past experiences may play a role in our emotions. The environment we grew up in may play a role. Parents who were anxious set an example to follow.

But in CHRIST, we are not stuck to repeat those habits or examples.

We can choose to take thoughts captive, trust the Lord, and be free from anxiety and fear.

Fear and anxiety may keep us from doing the things that God would want us to do.

Hebrews 11:6  “And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.”

We need to distinguish between fear that is right, and fear that is lack of faith in God. 

But we also have a lot of fear and anxiety because we have desires that are so important to us. If we are worshiping our desires, and that means believing that our “idol” will give us happiness, security, comfort, or whatever we want, we will be anxious and worried about losing that thing. When we are anxious we are valuing something more than worshiping God. If our desires lead us to anxiousness, even if the desire in itself is a good desire, then we have an idolatrous desire. We should stop and assess our heart’s desires when we feel anxiety, worry, or fear. We should examine if our desires are rooted in God’s character and His purposes in life or if we are trying to gain control of the situation as we want it.

Worry and anxiety are forgetting that God is sovereign, wise, good, and loving.

Sinful anger says, “God, you got that part of my life wrong”. We are judging that whatever circumstance happened, it shouldn’t have happened. If we were in control, we would have handled that better. Sinful anger is a judgment that God got it wrong.

Anxiety says, “God, you may not get that right in the future”. We are pridefully sure of what “should” happen for us in the future. When we are anxious and worried, we are doubting God’s plan and His wisdom to bring about what will bring Him glory and make us more like Christ. We want to control our future.

We are seeing things from a very limited perspective and not taking into account who God is and how He uses “all things”, including suffering, to mature us and make us like Christ.

Worry and anxiety are meditating on the wrong things. Rather than meditating on God and His character, we are focused on losing what we value too much. Worry focuses on our plan and is not submitted to “God’s will be done”.

We can be tempted to worry about many things, but what we do with the temptation reveals what we trust in!

Being tempted isn’t sinful. Even Jesus was tempted. But when we are tempted, our will (connected to our desires)  decides how we respond.

Jeremiah 17:5-8 contrasts the person who trusts in man and trusts in the Lord. (You can find a similar comparison in Psalm.)

Take a moment to go to the diagrams page on this website and find the “Jeremiah Trees” diagram to follow along as you read.

The fruit of the tree of trusting in self has the fruit of anxiety. 

The fruit of anxiety may be conflict, sleeplessness, or disordered eating. The fruit of anxiety may be irritability or severe over planning to try to prevent anything bad from happening in the future. Anxiety can be stewing in the mind and no one else besides God may know you are anxious.

But these symptoms show that there is a problem with the heart. The thoughts and desires of the heart are not fully trusting in God.

Anxiety can affect the physical body. 

Proverbs 12:25 says, “Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down.”

Anxiety can raise blood pressure and heart rate. Anxiety can cause fatigue, digestive issues and “irritable bowel syndrome”.

Anxiety may lead to ulcers. Anxiety may cause tight muscles and headaches. 

Because we are “embodied souls”, our spiritual state affects the physical body. 

But, we need to get to the root of our spiritual issue and not just deal with physical effects that happen as a result of spiritual issues.

We are morally responsible for our souls. So we need to address the heart issue - the anxiety - and not just the physical symptom.

Often people will take medication to alleviate anxiety, but medication only deals with the symptoms of anxiety. Medication does not address the heart. Whatever conviction you have about medication, you need to address the unbelief in your hearts. If you relieve the symptoms, it’s tempting to believe there isn’t a problem anymore. 

Only a heart that is loving God whole-heartedly, trusting God’s purpose and plan in our life glorifies Him. That’s why we need to make sure we address the desires and thoughts in our heart.

When we have a real physical issue,  we will feel tempted to anxiety at times. It is then that we need to choose how we will respond. Either give in to anxiety or fight with God’s character and Scripture in our minds.

We also need to distinguish between Godly Concern and Sinful Anxiety.

In the parable of the sower, worries of this life can choke out devotion to Jesus.

Matthew 13: 22 As for what was sown among thorns, this is the one who hears the word, but the cares of the world and the deceitfulness of riches choke the word, and it proves unfruitful.

This person has worries about this life.
In Luke 10 when Martha is anxious and troubled about many things we learn that anxiety is often a “divided mind”. Worry distracts us from what is important. Jesus tells Martha “one thing” is necessary. To keep her focus on Him.

Matthew 6 shows us that anxiety comes from thoughts that doubt God’s goodness and provision. When we doubt that God cares for His creation we doubt that God will care for us. Jesus tells his disciples they are of “little faith” because rather than trusting in God and His character, anxiety doubts God’s sovereignty and care.

When Jesus says, “do not be anxious” six times and gives us reasons to not be anxious when we think about the character of God. We are encouraged to think about how God cares for birds and provides for them. We are to think about the way God puts detailed design into each flower even though they bloom for such a short time. We are to consider that worry does nothing to add time or quality to life. 

Jesus says, “Oh you of little faith” because anxiety is questioning or doubting God’s character. If He truly is a sovereign, wise, compassionate, loving, good, just, righteous God, we have nothing to worry about.

It’s often said, you can’t stop a bird from flying over your head but you can stop a bird from nesting in your hair.

Typically, anxiety starts with a single thought, similar to sadness or depression. That might be the moment of temptation to anxiety.  See the diagram entitles “Tornado of Anxiety” on the diagrams page.

When that first thought of anxiousness comes, what do you do?

Anxiety tends to be about things that are outside of our responsibility and control. 

One thought of “what if _________ happens” can grow into a anxiety.

Go to the diagrams page and look at the “Circles of Responsibility” diagram.

The inner circle are things you are responsible for. You do have things that God has placed “on your plate” to fulfill.

My Responsibility

Studying God’s word is your responsibility

Serving and loving others

Saying no to temptation and pursuing holiness

Being involved in church and fellowship is important and up to you.

You have responsibilities in family - as a daughter, wife, mom

Our roles may have different aspects to them that are individual to our situation, but we all have things we need to do to honor the Lord.

You need to do work around your house - doing dishes, laundry, and you may need to hire workers to do jobs around your place.

You are to steward the body God gave. You are a temple of the Holy Spirit

God calls us to relationships and you have responsibilities to invest in others both in family and friends

God has a lot more in His responsibility than you do!

God is responsible for 

Salvations of everyone! Your family, husband, children,and  friends are dependent on God to open their eyes to see the glorious Christ and put their trust in Him.

Health/Illness - your health and the health of everyone you know and love is in God’s hands.

Weather

Natural Disasters

Other people’s treatment toward you  including children, husband, parents, co-workers, people on the road and grocery stores.

The Future is under God’s sovereign, wise plan.

Provision for you and your family comes from the Lord.

Your spouse’s sanctification and growth are directed by God.

All events that are unexpected to us are planned and purposed by God!

Godly Concern

We should show Godly concern by praying for the things that are in God’s responsibility. We should pray for our unsaved family members and that God would show them mercy and call them to saving faith.

We should pray for our health and healing for illness but we leave it with “God’s will be done” and trust Him for the outcome that He deems best.

We may pray for weather but know that God determines what is best. Our complaints or worry over weather is a distrust in God’s goodness.

We can pray about the future and ask God for what we’d like to see happen - but again, this is leaving the outcome with God. As we pray, our prayer should be for our desire to line up with God’s purposes.

We should pray for our own sanctification and our husband or children’s growth in the Lord - But God gives the growth. 

When we cross the line into trying to control or take over God’s responsibility, we experience anxiety.

When I want my mom, husband, or children to act differently or be saved, or grow in their relationship with the Lord so much that I am nagging, lecturing, stewing or responding sinfully with words or action, I am not trusting God.

When I find myself thinking about money and plotting mentally frequently how to pay for college or save for retirement, I am showing anxiousness rather than praying and trusting God.

When I am focused on my calendar and my to-do list, when I am making my 1 year plan, 3 year plan, 5 year plan and strategizing for how I will accomplish what I want to accomplish -am I showing Godly concern or have I crossed over into anxiety.

Godly concerns prays and rests in “God’s will be done”. 

Godly concern doesn’t get upset when the answer to prayer looks different than what we prayed for.

Godly concern prays and then goes about doing what you are responsible for, trusting God will do what is best - wise and loving and trusts that His plan is best.

Anxiety or worry prays but is really focused on “my way”.

Anxiety or worry may even pray manipulatively to try to get God to do what is being asked for.

Anxiety or worry prays, but then nags and complains and tries to figure out how to get what they want.

Anxiety and worry may pray, but still be stewing in the mind over the outcome.

There may be a link to the circles of responsibility with sadness/depression as well. Are we sad, continually, because we don’t have the ability to change what is God’s responsibility?

As you examine emotions within you, getting to the root of desire will help you understand the emotion more and be able to repent, if necessary, of what is going on in the motivations, desires, etc. 

Our emotions reveal our desires and thoughts.

When we are tempted to anxiety, we can turn it to Godly Concern by praying and trusting God’s sovereignty, wisdom, and care.

David is faced with a moment of anxiety when he writes Psalm 4.

Psalm 4

1. Answer me when I call, O God of my righteousness!
       You have given me relief when I was in distress.
       Be gracious to me and hear my prayer!

2. O men, how long shall my honor be turned into shame?
       How long will you love vain words and seek after lies? Selah

3. But know that the Lord has set apart the godly for himself;
       the Lord hears when I call to him.

4. Be angry, and do not sin;
       ponder in your own hearts on your beds, and be silent. Selah

5. Offer right sacrifices,
       and put your trust in the Lord.

6. There are many who say, “Who will show us some good?
       Lift up the light of your face upon us, O Lord!”

7. You have put more joy in my heart
       than they have when their grain and wine abound.

8. In peace I will both lie down and sleep;
       for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.

Verse 1 is a quick call for help! It’s the immediate response to trouble. Hear me!

The word for “distress” is literally being “in a tight spot”. When we feel like our circumstances are out of our control, when we feel trapped in a situation we don’t like and want out of, we are right where David was.

David is asking God to hear him and is recalling God’s faithfulness. He knows God has given relief in the past and he asks again for God to be God. He is thinking about God’s character and finding hope.

This prayer shows faith. He goes to God with the concerns rather than stewing in anxiety.

Is the Lord who you go to when you are in distress?

In verses 2 and 3 David begins to look at ways he could respond sinfully to anxiety. 

David talks about shame. 

“Should I have done something different?”

“Have I brought this on myself?”

In verse 3 he reminds himself that his identity is in Christ. We are accepted, forgiven, and loved by God. Even when we fail, we are children of God who rest in His care and protection.

When you are tempted to anxiety, do you think about your identity as a covenant child of God?

In verses 4 and 5, David sees that he could be angry at the circumstances and asks God to help not sin in anger.

When we are anxious and worried, there is a temptation to be quick to take out our emotions on others. Maybe we haven’t slept or we let the thoughts of uncertainty fester. Rather than give way to sinful anger and snapping at others, David prays that God would help him repent of his sinful thoughts and trust the Lord. 

Rather than sin in anger, David says help me ponder my heart and be silent in prayer and repentance. 

Our anxiety is only replaced with peace when we are trusting in the Lord. Anger associated with anxiety is changed when our desire is to rest in His plan and purpose.

Does your anger sometimes stem from fearful thoughts? Do you tend to be quick to anger when you are anxious?

In verses 6 - 8, David warns of doubting God’s protection and care. “Who will show us good?” 

David reminds himself that God is good and does good. David knows God’s sovereignty and rests in it.

When tempted in anxiety to go to “worst case scenario” thoughts or to allow the thoughts to spiral out of control, David reminds us to trust in God.

David thanks God for all He has done.

  “You have put joy in my heart”

“You make me dwell in safety”

Charles Spurgeon wrote, “The sovereignty of God is the pillow upon which the child of God rests His head at night, giving perfect peace.”

Do you thank God and recount His blessings when you are anxious?

In anxiety - think about your thoughts.

What do your thoughts reveal about what you want?

What desire do you have that is so precious to you that you are anxious about losing or not getting?

Will you submit to God’s plan and trust Him for what you have or what is taken away?

God invites us to repent of those idols and turn to Him to find peace.